August 16, 1967
What did you feel at the darshan yesterday – not “darshan," at
the meditation?… Nothing special?
No, Mother. It was fine, but I don’t know.
Ah … (in a disappointed tone). You were at home?
No, in Sri Aurobindo’s room.
Oh….
Do you know, I sat down when it was nearly time [for the meditation], maybe half a minute before, and instantly, without warning, like a staggering blow: such a powerful descent (I was completely stilled) of something…. At the same time Sri Aurobindo seemed to tell me (because the definition came along with the “thing” – it was a vision which wasn’t a vision, which was absolutely concrete), and the word was golden peace. But so strong! And it didn’t budge anymore. For the entire half-hour it didn’t budge. Never before … It’s something new, I had never felt that before. I can’t say…. It was perceived, but not like an objective vision. And other people spontaneously told me that as soon as they sat down for the meditation (gesture of a massive descent), something came with a tremendous power, everything was stilled, and a sense of peace as they had never felt in their life.
Golden peace …
And indeed it gave a sense of supramental golden light, but it
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was … such peace! A concrete peace, you know, not the negation of disorder and activity, no: concrete, a concrete peace. I didn’t want to stop: they sounded the gong, but I stayed on for two or three minutes. When I did stop, it went away. And it made such a difference for the body – the body itself - such a difference that when the experience went away I felt in great discomfort and it took me half a minute to find my balance again.
It came and went away. It came for the meditation, then went away. For more than a half-hour: thirty-five minutes.
Golden peace.
And in the evening [at the balcony], there was a crowd (I think it was the largest crowd we’ve ever had, it filled all the streets; the streets were full of people as far as the eye could see), so I came out. And when I went out, there arose from that whole crowd a sort of … something in between an entreaty, a prayer and a protest, against the world’s condition, and particularly the country’s. And it rose up in waves…. I looked at it (it was particularly insistent), then said to myself, “Today isn’t my day, it’s Sri Aurobindo’s day,” and I did like this (gesture of withdrawal) and put Sri Aurobindo in front. Then, when he came in front, when he put himself in front, he simply said, very simply, “The Lord knows better what He is doing.” (Mother laughs) I immediately started smiling (I didn’t laugh, but started smiling), and there came the same peace as in the morning.
That’s all.
The Lord knows better what He is doing … with his most perfect sense of humor. And everything calmed down right away.
I felt like laughing, but I smiled.
You were at your doorway?
No, I was inside and looking through the window, because the
street was full of people…. But Mother, how is it that I always
perceive the same thing? There are differences of intensity, but
it’s ALWAYS the same thing. I am not complaining because it’s
admirably peaceful, powerful, tranquil, but it’s always the
”same thing”; I can’t say that one meditation is very different
from any other: whether I am with you or whether I am at the
darshan, it’s the same state.
But the minute (really the minute – it wasn’t even a state in time, it really was the minute), the minute I made contact with what I call the Supreme, that is, the part that looks after the earth,
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throughout the years it has always been i-den-ti-cal-ly the same thing.
All that has differences is below. That is the summit. And the summit … that’s why I use the word “Supreme,” because there’s nothing other than “That,” which is supreme Peace, supreme Light, a sort of supreme tranquil Bliss, a sense of supreme Power and a Consciousness … an all-containing Consciousness, like that (immense gesture) … and then it’s over. It’s still. Still – not “motionless,” but far above movement, far above. And identical, with the sense that “it’s like that forever.” And it contains everything, but … (immutable gesture, the palms of the hand drawn back).
As soon as you make contact with that, everything is fine.
Change, movement, newness is when you are on the way – on the way you keep having experiences, one upon another upon another; or when you are on the road to transformation, there is one thing, then another, then yet another. But when you make contact THERE, it’s over (same immutable gesture). Every time you make contact there, it’s like that. And it contains everything, but … you are not concerned with that. [[With what it contains. ]]
And naturally, it’s supreme rest, supreme power, supreme knowledge, supreme consciousness … and something more.
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