ISBN 2-902776-33-0
(Concerning the years 1946-1948, when Satprem first came to
Pondicherry to join the government of French India
with Governor Baron.)
An image has remained with me which I can't forget. There was a new governor, the one who succeeded Baron [in 1949], and I had gone to see him with Pavitra, and on my way out, in the salon or on the veranda, I don't remember, or the balcony, you were sitting there -- don't you remember?
No, Mother.
You were two or three -- you were sitting there. You were still here, you hadn't yet left [Pondicherry]. And that has remained with me -- even now. How long ago was it?
Twenty ... -five years ago.
It has remained clear-clear, so clear: I see you sitting there, like that, with your back to the light (the sky was behind you). And I don't know why, but that struck me very much, I've retained the memory of it. Even now I can see the same image. It's strange.... We had come to see those people (that really didn't interest me, but ...), but then, when I saw you: "Ah!" It was like ... you know, like something saying to me (Mother lowers her index finger): "That one." You understand?
And it has remained with me ever since. There are so many, so many things I've completely forgotten, but that remains. You don't remember?
No, Mother.... I have other memories of you at that time, but
not that one. [[Actually, Satprem well remembered that encounter, but he wanted to spare Mother the account of his own state of mind that day, for he was angry with Mother (!) because she was paying a visit to the man who had schemed to take Governor Baron's place. Thus the great story and the small one go hand in hand. ]]
It's strange. Even now I see it, you know. There was the sky, it was like.... You were sitting on a stool or a kind of bench, there
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were one or two people (I don't know) with you, but I didn't notice them, whereas you, I saw you like this (Mother lowers a finger), like ... : "That one."
It's strange. It's interesting.
I am glad you saw me!
(Mother laughs and takes Satprem's hands)
It was like this: (Mother makes a gesture of grasping Satprem's wrist).
(silence)
The body is being taught to exist by the Divine alone, to count on the Divine for everything -- absolutely, absolutely everything without exception. There is even a pressure for.... It's only when the consciousness is linked to its utmost to the Divine Consciousness that there's the sense of existence. It has become extraordinarily intense. When the physical gets converted, it will be something SOLID, you know, unalterable -- and complete. And so concrete.... The difference between being in the Divine, existing only by Him and for Him, and then being in the ... not in the ordinary consciousness obviously, but just the human consciousness, is so great that the one seems like death compared to the other, it's so.... I mean the physical realization is really a concrete realization.
There is beginning to be such a concentration of energy (oh! it's not there yet, very far from it, but ...), there's a beginning of perception of how things will be. It's ... it's really marvelous. And so powerful! A power and a reality in the consciousness that nothing, absolutely nothing else can have -- everything vital or mental and all that seems hazy and unsubstantial. Whereas this is concrete (Mother clenches her fists). And so strong!
Some problems are still to be solved, but not with words or thoughts. And things come to demonstrate -- not just personal things, but also things from people around me; people, things, circumstances, all that comes for teaching, teaching the body to have the true consciousness. It's ... it's marvelous.
(Mother goes within)
It seems that the problem was to create a physical being capable
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of bearing the Power that wants to manifest -- all ordinary bodily consciousnesses are too thin and fragile to withstand the overwhelming Power that is to manifest. And so the body is being accustomed to it. It's as if ... you know, as if it suddenly caught a glimpse of such, such a marvelous horizon ahead, but overwhelmingly marvelous! Then, it is allowed to take only as much of it as it can bear.
Some adaptation is required.
It's quite evident where rest and food are concerned (especially food). It's very strange.... The transition ... right in the middle of the transition.
Will it have enough plasticity? I don't know.
It's a matter of plasticity. To be able to withstand and transmit (gesture of something flowing through her), to offer no obstacle to the Power that wants to manifest.
Appearances are only future consequences. That's why.... The appearance is what will change last.
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